When…

I had that dream again
She embraced my soul
It comforted me knowing
Nearly made me whole
She sometimes speaks
Her words are divine
Other times silent
But still that feels fine
I sometimes cry
When in light she appears
Makes no difference
She lightens my fears
Soothes my heart
While offering faith
I know I should try
But I know she’s a wraith
This is a dream
Its gone when I wake
Hopeless tomorrow
My faith it was fake
I felt so complete
Nothing but peace
Finally at last
Sadness did cease
Time takes it toll
Daybreak appears
Waking in optimism
But greeting my fears
Another blind struggle
Trying to be free
Looking for the best
Way to be me
Pretending I’m happy
While hoping it comes true
Or hide in the darkness
Lie again to you
I don’t know who to choose
What I should be
All I know is everyday
Its disheartening not to see
I wish I lived  that dream
Know everything is just right
But everyday the confidence fades
Yet again I’m blinded in sight
Tomorrow is a new day
I’ll take my chances then
I say that every dawn break
I cant wait to get to when.